The quality of these photos are not very sharp bc there was no flash-photography allowed in the NICU. I'm quite sure you all know the story of Stephen's birth. But for more details and photos, etc.. you can read his full story on his webpage, which I have not updated in 2 years. But.. the story of course, is the same.
The 1st picture above, was the first time, I ever saw his face. I wish the staff had prepared me for the tubes that were going in and out of him.
The 2nd photo was snapped moments later, the first time I was allowed to touch him. You can see how careful I was, I didn't want to break him. He weighed 3 pounds, 5 ounces. He was almost 24 hrs.old before they let my friend wheel me to the NICU to see him. By the way, Susy, did I ever thank you for being there, and for taking these first photos? Thank you, they are priceless to me.
Before this moment, I had only caught a glimpse of Stephen. He was blue and his cry sounded like a new born kitten, crying for it's mama. I didn't understand why they wouldn't allow me to see him for 24 hrs. Looking back, and knowing that the frst 72 hrs were the most critical, I now understand. I don't really know how to describe the following weeks, because everything was so uncertain. On New Year's Eve, he was diagnosed with a congenital heart condition (see his website) For the 1st few weeks, I was afraid to touch him, hold him, or even look at him for too long. I didn't want to get attached and then have him taken away from me. That shelter I built around my heart was useless, I already loved him and the attachment began when I saw the + sign on the home pregnancy test. ... Stay tuned for more Stephen stories! He was born on 12/26/92 so this time of year drags a lot of emotions out of me.
12 comments:
Hi Mia!
Very touching new journal you have here.
When I read your "about me", and the thing
you said about at one time being a different
person until Stephen was born, I could so relate
to that. That was me too, until Dallis came into
my life, she saved me, literally. The love of a child,
there is nothing else like it in the whole world.
BTW, Stephen was a year old, on my wedding day.
Love, Penny
The pictures of Stephen are precious. He was soooo tiny. All the tubes, his little naked body - it's so sad. I'm sure your heart broke when you saw him.. and filled again, with love. 12/26 is a special date for me as well. You gained something, I lost something. But it's amazing to me that we share that date in common. And it only serves to further endear me to you and your son. :)
Mia, just read your journal and all about Stephen. I have a son that was born with a birth defect and his birth completely changed the way I viewed life. It made me realize that the important things in life are not what you have, or how you look. The journey is never easy, but the love that results from what we are given is boundless and measureless. (my journal is Jukebox Woman).
Great Pictures. My daughter was born 12/24/92. That's pretty darn cool.
I believe my husband has already commented here about the birthdate of stephen, yea..our daughter was born just 2 days before. I knew they were around the same age, but I didn't realize how close :)
btw...LOVE the pictures. I know what you mean by treasuring these photo's. I wouldn't have those "brand new" photo's of my daughter either if it wasn't for my mother in law. We didn't think of bringing a camera along the first time around. Such special pictures I have of her, so little, fragile, sweet...a precious beautiful moment.
Oh Mia you sparked a memory I love the way you said the attachment began when I saw the + sign on the home pregnancy test! I love your new home! Thanks for sharing Stephen with us! He has new email from me.
whoohoo! E-mail from Vivian! (you're spoling him and he's loving it!lol) I'll go check that right now! Thanks, dear! Hugs...
The pictures are amazing, what unbelieveable treasures they are.
Oh, geeze. I saw the photos and read the sidebar and a bit of your second entry ... and then I couldn't read any more. Had tears in my eyes. These kind of stories tear me up. So you'll have to give me time to prepare myself emtionally, Mia, before I feel brave enough to go to Stephen's site. (I can't watch the pet detectives / pet cops / pet rescues on Animal Planet, either. I'm just too emotional.)
I'm saying a prayer for Stephen. May that heart beat for a long, long time.
So, it's true... there ARE good people left in this world.
Blessings to you and your family Mia!!
Everyone else: Ever notice how the most beautiful people are the one's, like Mia, that see the beauty in every thing and every one else?!
Mia ~ I've avoided this entry as long as I could. I just knew I'd come in here and start weeping - tears of sadness, hope and joy. You and Stephen have a tendency to do that to me! Then I read the comments... wow, touching additions. Beautiful entry, as usual. I guess I didn't realize Stephen is the same age as some of the little ones [or, not-so-little anymore] in my life. Love to both of you.
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